Mis-adventures.

For those of you who don't know, the human body is not really meant to be able to digest dairy products. Our bodies just aren't made that way, hence lactose intolerant people. I thought that just meant people were prejudice or something. I don't understand it, dairy is good. But it's true, check wiki-pedia.

Anyways, when I first heard this tidbit of information, I was of course flabbergasted and upset. How could something that gives you strong bones be bad for you? I was determined to prove that dairy could never affect me in a bad way, and to do this I came up with three tests.

Test #1: The Milk Challenge.

To the grocery store! My friend Randy accompanied me to purchase four different 4 litre milk jugs; one 2% milk, one chocolate milk, one strawberry flavoured, and one skimmed. The thought process was to keep this little experiment very scientific. Clearly.

I believe I got through about three quarters of the 2% jug before I learned that indeed, too much dairy equals bad news bears. On the way back up the milk is still cold and it stings your nostrils, and if you get it on your clothing, you smell like cottage cheese. Chocolate milk is the basically the same, as Randy found out, except it's brown. Yuck.

We were out of commission for a while after this test, and we were too lazy to do tests 2 and 3, so we quit.

The moral is, too much of a good thing can make you barf. Remember that kids.

-Pat